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Paradise

 Every time she closed her eyes she dreamed of a paradise. A place where there was no hate and arguments, no anger, but love and acceptance, happiness and togetherness. Everyone was friendly and knew each other, spend time with everyone and happiness ruled the world. Everybody did what made them happy, and only good things made them happy. No one hurt anyone, no pain or sorrow, no depression or psychosis, everyone was healthy.

But her real life was like hell. She was drowning in pain and loneliness, her family didn't care about her and her friends didn't notice her. Her boyfriend who she had thought was the love of her life cheated on her multiple times, and mostly with her friends. She had a deep depression which no one tried to treat because no one knew about it. The only person in the world who actually cared for her, her grandpa, had died of old age, and she was all alone in life.

All she needed was one person who she could confide in, but no one cared about her or even spend any time with her, so she created that person in her mind. She created a paradise for herself and that one person who loved her more than anything. She wrote down their conversations and everything they did, and when she was writing or reading her texts, she was happy.

In their world, everything was pretty. There were no ugly or sad things. And no on else except them. Because she didn't need anyone else. Every night in her dreams she would talk and play with that person, she would tell him how she was lonely and no one cared for her, and how she was depressed, and he would tell her that he cared about her, that he loved her, and that to him there was nothing else except her. And he would hug her and everything would be good and she would be happy. But as always, she would wake up and face the harsh reality.

And always, when she woke up, she went to her desk and took her notebook, her favourite pen and started writing. She would spend hours writing, and soon she had many notebooks full of stories about her and him, and after writing for hours she would read, read until she fell asleep on her bed and dreamed again. She barely ate anything, and soon she became weak and thin as a stick. She lost dozens of pounds in mare weeks, but she kept writing until she was too weak to even get out of bed and then she just slept, waking up every few hours to suffer, and then fell asleep again for a while.

This was her life for weeks, and her condition went down really fast because no one noticed she was just sleeping all day and didn't show up to eat or anything. But the last moments of her life she dreamed about the paradise with him, and she was happy.

The slightest smile appeared on her lips, her heart beat once, and then there was nothing but complete silence. Nothing moved, nothing happened. Dead silence. She was gone.

And no one noticed.

Just a little story I wrote today, the song was Paradise by Coldplay, hope you like it~~! Comments and critique is appreciated!!

I was wrighting in pain

 I was writhing in pain.

I had lost the one thing that meant the most, and there was only pain left. Nothing else. So there I wrighted, inside of pain, feeling it all around me. But I didn't care about the pain. I only cared that I had lost him.

I lost my will to live. I had nothing to live for. All my friends left me one by one because I shut myself inside and didn't let anyone come close. I never wanted to feel that pain again. I didn't want to live, but killing myself felt as meaningless as life itself.

I didn't know what to do so every day I got up, left for work without eating or drinking anything, spend the whole day at work, and finally when I got home I ate just enough to keep the worst hunger off and sat in front of a table, just staring into nothingness. Eventually I stopped going to work and then I went out of food so I couldn't eat either, and all day long every day I just sat there without seeing anything.

That was when something brought me back to the moment. My phone rang. I had gotten so used to silence that the beep of my phone had woken me from my coma.

It was a message from you. You asked if we could meet. Something inside of me moved and I felt something else than pain for the first time in months.

I got up, got dressed and headed for downtown to meet up with you. I was early but I didn't have anything else to do either. I must have waited for hours, and during all that time anticipation built up inside of me, making me all bubbly and then I felt something strange on my face. I lifted my hand up to my face and I recognized it. I was smiling.

I saw you coming so I started to move towards you. The closer I got the faster I walked, until I was running and we barely maintained standing when I crashed in you, but you just hugged me back. I felt myself smile even wider and looked at you. You looked beautiful in that skirt I had helped you pick up, your dark hair framing your beautiful face. You smiled back and it felt like I had gotten my long lost life back. I hugged you even tighter and felt better than I had in too long. And it was all thanks to your message. No one could replace the one I had lost, but you brought more to my life than he ever did.

Just a little story I wrote for a friend of mine, hope you like it~~ 'u' Comments and critique is really appreciated!!

The more I see

http://Katori.favor.org/in-the-garden-of-love-and-flowers

Favor.org

Missing you Part 4

There you stood, in front of me. I was in shock.

Your eyes were filled with anger, your clothes soaked in blood, your hands in dirt.

I couldn't believe it was you. It looked like you, but it was a completely different person. No kindness in your eyes, no smile on your lips, no welcoming arms held towards me asking to come for an embrace. Every bit of you was gone.

Then it all became normal. No more hatred, no more blood, no more dirt. Just kindness, a smile and welcoming arms stretched my way. The horror in my eyes must have confused you because your smile changed into a questioning look, your eyes a little lost.

The change was too much for me and my feet disappeared from under me. I could feel the cold floor on my thigh. The cold feeling seemed to wake me up from my dreaming and I blinked once. Then I saw everything was okay and you were there with me and I started to cry from relief.

You came to me and held me in your arms until I stopped crying. But I wouldn't let go. I pressed my head against your chest and held my arms tightly around you.

When I finally took my head from your chest I stared into your eyes and we stayed like that for a half an hour. Then you asked me if I was hungry, kissed me on the forehead and lifted me up. Finally I could let go of my suspicion and I knew it was okay.

For now, I didn't know when the next time would come, but I denied myself the fear and enjoyed the time we had.

Not The End

All in all it's a perfect scene

I'm happy, that I'm not a daughter of some big corporation. Because, even though I would have money, there would also be a lot of pressure. I would have to take over the company or marry with someone rich, whom I don't love, and all my future I would have to act my best, go to stupid big parties, and never finding true love.

But now, now that I'm teh daughter of a bank cashier, I can be whatever I want, act the way that feels right for me, that feels good, not the way that is propriate. It's okay for me to fail sometimes, it's okay for me to fall in love with someone, it's okay for me to be with that someone, it's okay for me to make mistakes.

I'm actually really happy about my life.

But why do I still forbid myself from acting the way my heart desires?

Love stories~♥

I was so happy. I probably even said it out loud since I heard it, but didn't see anyone else there. I was happy because soon I would see you again. I would get to hold you, brush your hair, hold your hand, kiss your lips, your cheeks. I would get to talk to you and laugh with you and hear you talk to me. I was so happy even though I still didn't have you by my side yet.

But then you came. And you were everything I had dreamed for and more. You were so funny and cute, I couldn't stop laughing. You brought me ice cream and my favourite drink, just to make me feel better. I was bursting with happiness. Every time I touched you my heart started to pound faster.

I couldn't imagine a bigger happiness than being with you in that moment. But then you said something and I didn't really hear you. You started to fade away and when I tried to grab you my hand went right through you. I started panicing and crying.

I woke up, screaming and tears on my cheeks. At first I couldn't see anything through my tears, but I felt something on my hand and I wiped away my tears with my other hand and looked and saw your hand. Then I looked up and saw your face, all concerned. But when you saw my silly look you smiled and started laughing. You told me I'm cute. That made me smile, too. And slowly, I was happy again. You made me a healthy breakfast that tasted bad but I loved it because it was made by you. We spend the day in bed, talking and drawing random stuff and it was one of the best days of my life. Everything that I have from you is very precious to me and every time you're away I'm anxious to get back to you. You're my love and I couldn't imagine anyone better.

This was wrote to my honey~ He wasn't feeling very well so I wrote this to cheer him up♥ I really hope you'll feel better in the future, too, and I'll do my best to help you with that! That shall be my new goal! Love you♥

The song used was the Glee version of the song Lucky~